Blog Posts

Read the latest blog posts by Lee

Lisa Dinhofer: A Thanatologists' View on Alcoholism

Lisa is a certified Thanatologist (grief & loss specialist) with a subspecialty in tra...

Oct 14, 2019

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Bernadette Jiwa

  Bernadette Jiwa helps people and companies to find, own and tell the stories that set t...

Oct 14, 2019

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The Dangers Of Your Environment

  In this week's episode of the AA Podcast, Lee Davy goes solo, talking about the role that...

Oct 09, 2019

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The Race Meet Podcast III

  In this week's episode, we pull down the curtain on the Race Meet Trigger, as Striver Kim...

Sep 25, 2019

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The Race Meet Trigger Part II

  In this week's episode of the AA Podcast, Lee Davy continues to help Striver Kim to make ...

Sep 12, 2019

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The Race Meet Trigger

  Feeling confident as someone that doesn't drink alcohol, Striver Kim volunteers to serve ...

Sep 04, 2019

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Nick Littlehales on Sleep

  Nick Littlehales is a Sport Sleep Coach who counts Sir Alex Ferguson's Manchester United,...

Aug 19, 2019

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Lisa Erlandsen on the Magic of Thrive

Lisa Erlandsen is a Licensed Thrive Consultant for The Thrive Programme based in Bournemouth ...

Jul 26, 2019

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The Gods

There was a time when eating in restaurants was a favourite hobby of mine. Today, it’s ...

Jul 19, 2019

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The Only Way Out is Through

After a bike ride that’s taken him less than four hours to travel 50-miles, Tony wonder...

Jul 18, 2019

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Liz Timoney-White on Becoming Unstuck

    Liz Timoney-White is a people problem solver who helps interesting people find su...

Jul 17, 2019

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Sugar-Free Poison

I’m in the lift in the ARIA Resort in Las Vegas.    Two guys join me, both dr...

Jul 03, 2019

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The Fire

I sit on the Tube imaging a bomb exploding in slow motion. Reaper-like flames claw at my Zi...

Jun 25, 2019

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Finishing Things

  Neil Gaiman’s Masterclass on creative writing is brilliant, and one of the thin...

Jun 21, 2019

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Vinny Grant on Trauma

  Vinny Grant came across personal development at 18 years of age, and it quickly became ...

Jun 20, 2019

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Will Cole on the Life of a Ketotarian

  Dr. Will Cole, leading functional-medicine expert, consults people aro...

Jun 13, 2019

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Busy

  A writing client recently asked me to revamp an old article. The work entailed going ...

Jun 07, 2019

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A Resistance Reversal

  The universe is vast, and somewhere, deep inside, you’ll find a Dry Martini wit...

Jun 03, 2019

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To Pub or Not to Pub

  We currently have a thread kicking arse on Strive called “To Pub or Not to Pu...

May 20, 2019

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Growing Pains Star Jeremy Miller on Alcoholism

    As a child actor born and raised in southern California, Jeremy Miller was ...

May 16, 2019

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Greyscale

  Game of Thrones fans will remember Ser Jorah Mormont picking up a greyscale infection...

May 13, 2019

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The Arena

  “It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man...

May 10, 2019

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BJ Fogg on The Small Changes That Change Everything

  BJ Fogg is a behavioural scientist that has personally coached over 40,000 people i...

May 08, 2019

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UFC Legend Bruce Buffer on Success

  Bruce Buffer has been the “Official Voice of the Octagon” for the Ultimat...

May 03, 2019

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Traffic Lights

  A woman with three children stands at the edge of the kerb. The light is red. For a s...

May 01, 2019

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Perspective

  There’s an air of desperation when it comes to the mulling over period before t...

Apr 29, 2019

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The Toothbrush

  How could I forget to brush my teeth? I'm 44. I think. Maybe that’s why I forgo...

Apr 26, 2019

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Jim and Janice Prochaska on Changing to Thrive

  This week my guests on the AA Podcast are James and Janice Prochaska.James O. Prochaska...

Apr 24, 2019

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The Leaky Tap

I can hear the sound of running water gushing from the tap behind me.   I shake my d...

Apr 22, 2019

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The Lock-Up

  I have ‘stuff’ in a lock-up in Cardiff. It could go the way of Notre Da...

Apr 22, 2019

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Not Skid Row

  The day I led Jude through Skid Row was not an auspicious moment. I heard his mother ...

Apr 09, 2019

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Obi Wan Kenobi

  In today's podcast episode, Lee Davy dissects a valuable post from Striver Kim describi...

Apr 08, 2019

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Twelve

  As I listen to Walk Like an Egyptian by The Bangles, I crack my knuckles, romanticise...

Apr 03, 2019

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TTAA Ambassador John on Being Someone That Doesn't Drink Alcohol

  John is 42 years old hailing from the North of England who has always known alcohol w...

Apr 02, 2019

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Judgments

  My sweaty back itches against the roughed up wood of the garage door. The sun is tick...

Mar 28, 2019

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Craters

  Connor has a hole in his heart.    It hasn’t stopped him turning in...

Mar 26, 2019

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How Envy Can Be Used As A Force For Good

  During a recent trip to Jeju, South Korea, I interviewed high stakes poker players. One...

Mar 25, 2019

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Failure Doesn't Exist When Becoming Someone That Doesn't Drink Alcohol

  “Failure is a lack of success, or the omission of expected or required action.&...

Mar 21, 2019

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Scott Stabile on Love, Empathy and Forgiveness

  Scott Stabile is a writer, speaker, and workshop wizard. His inspirational posts and ...

Mar 20, 2019

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Processing Life 'Before' And 'After' Alcohol

  The buzzing as the fly desperately tries to escape the maze of my mother-in-law&rsquo...

Mar 19, 2019

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Will Concentration and Energy Levels Increase When I Become Someone...

  The fridge light turns me on.    A carton of milk with a familiar face ...

Mar 18, 2019

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Power

I spent my entire life trying to ‘fit-in’.   Then I became someone that ...

Mar 18, 2019

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Lessons From World Class Poker Players We Can Adopt During the 6 St...

  One of the most shameful moments of my life was a fight I had with my ex-wife. We w...

Mar 13, 2019

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Colour Code Personality Science With Striver Claes

I always wanted to Bruce Lee.   I wanted to 'Enter the Dragon'.   I wanted to...

Mar 11, 2019

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Stella & Georgie on the Child/Parent Dynamic

A Polaroid snap.A desperate need for that feather in the cap. You thought your childhood...

Mar 08, 2019

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The Hack

  A cigarette machine is an evil thing, and as he stood there before me, shaking nervousl...

Mar 06, 2019

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When Talking About Alcohol Choose Your Dance Partner Wisely

  John is in his 70s. He looks like Al Capone, resplendent with fedora, black and wh...

Mar 05, 2019

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How Do I Become Someone That Doesn't Drink Alcohol?

  The man was picking up cigarette butts. One.Two.Three.That man was me.Rummaging th...

Feb 19, 2019

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How do I Stop Thinking About Alcohol?

  Megan can’t stop thinking about alcohol.She writes to me, “How can I stop t...

Feb 17, 2019

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Igor Kurganov on Loneliness, Friendships and Serving Others

  Igor Kurganov is a professional poker player and effective altruist. Kurganov is the fo...

Feb 14, 2019

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The Wonderful Things I Can Do With my Time Without Alcohol

  Poverty.We think it’s a lack of money, but for me, it’s a lack of a discern...

Feb 12, 2019

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I am Someone That Doesn't Drink Alcohol; You Got a Problem With That?

  When I was a kid, I was the jumper in your closet that you never wore. I wasn’t g...

Feb 07, 2019

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When You Become Someone That Doesn’t Drink Alcohol Don’t Listen to ...

I never leave the Coliseum. Blood.Sweat.Heads.Arms.Feet.I never leave because you are he...

Feb 06, 2019

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Take 100% Responsibility For Your Life Including Your Addiction to ...

  Hot tears track like lava down the side of my face. How could she do this to me?Ar...

Feb 05, 2019

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TV Presenter & Poker Pro Liv Boeree on Positive Thinking, Probabili...

  During my time at the PokerStars Player’s No-Limit Hold’em Championship in ...

Feb 04, 2019

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Death

  I flex my muscles.Wedge my feet into the blocks. Stare at the finish line.Breathe. I fi...

Feb 01, 2019

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My Life Was Full

  Another poem by Rupi Kaur from 'The Sun And Her Flowers' that spoke to me. “...

Jan 31, 2019

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The Gang

  A bucketful of crabs. One tries to leave. The rest drag it back down. I guess crabs lik...

Jan 30, 2019

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1,000 Steps

  A Mexican wave begins when one person stands up. The skyscrapers reach out to the ...

Jan 28, 2019

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You Drink The Average Amount of Alcohol as The Five People You Spen...

John, my friend in his 70s who believes an alien race rules the world, explains how he’...

Jan 25, 2019

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Stand Up Comedy Genius Norm MacDonald on Being Someone That Doesn't...

David Letterman referred to Norm Macdonald as “maybe the smartest guy in comedy,”...

Jan 24, 2019

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The 6 Reasons People Don't Take the Taster to Become Someone That D...

I don’t need you or your experiences to be someone that doesn’t drink alcohol. ...

Jan 23, 2019

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Chubby

Those toes will never know the feel of a ballet shoe. The sunlight that scorches through...

Jan 22, 2019

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Exhaustion

Another fantastic poem by Rupi Kaur in her collection The Sun and Her Flowers."This place mak...

Jan 21, 2019

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Are Your GPS Co-ordinates Set? Do You Know The Way to an Alcohol-Fr...

Outside the town is a sign.“Population: a million people that don’t drink alcohol...

Jan 20, 2019

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The NY Times Best-Selling Author Maria Konnikova on Connection; Aut...

Here is the first of a series of interviews I did with poker players during the PokerStars Ca...

Jan 18, 2019

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How to End the Feeling That You're 'Missing Out' When You Stop Drin...

I feel like the plane crashed, and as I walk through the wreckage, I realise that I am the on...

Jan 17, 2019

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Alcoholic Drinks Are Nothing But Delivery Systems For Alcohol

I can feel the roar.Somewhere between the gut and the throat, there is a cork. I want to walk...

Jan 16, 2019

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The Great Real Ale and Gin Hoax: Why Taste Has Nothing to Do With It

Our distinctive blend marries the crisp, honeyed citrus fruit of Chenin Blanc with the plush ...

Jan 15, 2019

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The Shocking Truth About Life: We Are Going to Die, And We Don’t Kn...

In the BBC documentary, Drinkers Like Me, the British TV and radio presenter, Adrian Chiles, ...

Jan 14, 2019

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Can We Really Trust Our Belief That We Drink Alcohol Because We Lik...

There is a strange looking device in my room. It says to pour the water into ‘here&rsqu...

Jan 13, 2019

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The Evaporating Thought

It’s 7.30 am, a blink ago it was 4.01 am.    Walkie-talkies crackle into ...

Jan 11, 2019

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Loyal

This one is a poem from Rupi Kaur's collection, 'The Sun And Her Flowers.'"I remained committ...

Jan 10, 2019

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Isolation

I read a fucking book?!I didn’t go to rehab, take a 12-step meeting, take Antabuse - I ...

Jan 10, 2019

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How to Not Drink Alcohol And Not feel isolated When Out in The Plac...

“You’re a hack.”It hurt.Not a stabbing knife in the guts hurt; more the gra...

Jan 06, 2019

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Nathan Simpson on Becoming Someone That Doesn't Drink Alcohol

In December, I received the following email from Nathan Simpson.Lee,I just wanted to drop you...

Jan 04, 2019

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Personality Alert: Why You'll Need a Personality Transplant When Yo...

My daughter needs a smoothie. My wife asks me to get it. 40-minutes there, and 40-minutes bac...

Jan 02, 2019

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How to Relax in Social Situations

Charlotte asks: “How do you relax in social situations?”Lee Davy answers the ques...

Jan 02, 2019

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The Revolving Door

“You cannot walk in and out of me like a revolving door I have too many miracles happen...

Dec 31, 2018

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Christmas Presence

I would be slightly buzzed. Not enough to need the bucket, but enough to make it difficult to...

Dec 31, 2018

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Why I Won't Finish in The Realm of Hungry Ghosts

I read a fucking book?!I didn’t go to rehab, take a 12-step meeting, take Antabuse - I ...

Dec 28, 2018

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A Review of You Are a Badass at Making Money by Jen Sincero

I am in debt. I owe my father £2,000, and I have £6,000 in credit card debt. In 2...

Dec 27, 2018

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Shock Horror: Man Refuses to Wear Face Cream Because of What People...

Before I go to bed, I stick a blob on my forehead, one on each cheek, a smidgen on the nose, ...

Dec 26, 2018

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Personality Alert: Why You'll Need a Personality Transplant When Yo...

I wanted perfection. That was the goal. I knew I would never make it (I'm not fucking mental)...

Dec 25, 2018

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How Thinking Someone Who Smokes Marijuana is a Skank Helped Me Quit...

The stench is the trigger sending the scent of smoke slithering up my nostril like a sea snak...

Dec 24, 2018

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How to Quieten a Busy Mind Without Alcohol

A Striver asks “How can I quiet the busy mind without alcohol?”In today’s p...

Dec 23, 2018

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Social Media: How Safe Are Your Social Media Feeds From Alcoholism?

Clair asks: “Can the numerous memes, photos and posts on social media glorifying alcoho...

Dec 22, 2018

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Emotions & Flow: How a State of Flow Helps us Kill Our Desire For A...

Liza is going to buy a scrapbook and fill it with keepsakes and memories of Zia, so she can l...

Dec 22, 2018

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Choose a Corner: Are You For Alcohol or Against It?

I walked into the house and a second had passed after the hug when my brother-in-law asked me...

Dec 20, 2018

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Using the Locus of Creativity to Become Someone That Doesn't Drink ...

Panic. They will be home soon, and I haven't finished. The car horn tells me to stop and help...

Dec 19, 2018

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A Note to John About The Cave

John, I believe the cave represents our subconscious. It's the place we exist when we are so...

Dec 18, 2018

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Episode #170: A World Without Wine

By the end of today, I would have written five articles about poker. I wrote my first back in...

Dec 13, 2018

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Episode #169: This is Marketing- A Book Review

  In Seth Godin’s brilliant book, This is Marketing there is a musing called The Ri...

Dec 11, 2018

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Episode #168 - The Family Business

Eartha says:I grew up in a family that makes wine. I grew up drinking. My parents are the found...

Dec 07, 2018

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Episode #167: What if I Can't Stay Stopped?

In this AA Podcast episode Lee Davy answers a question from Claes: "What if I Can't Stay Stoppe...

Dec 05, 2018

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Episode #166: Can You Drink Moderately?

In today’s AA Podcast Episode Lee Davy answers a question from Felix:  “Can yo...

Dec 04, 2018

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Cake

I have never baked a cake. Baking a cake = hard work. I don’t eat cake these ...

Nov 29, 2018

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The Cleaner

Johann Hari told Sam Harris that a Gallup poll revealed that approx. 80% of Americans didn&rs...

Nov 28, 2018

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Episode #165: Buying Alcohol For Others

Striver Phil asks:   “What does everyone do when it comes to buying alcohol for ...

Nov 27, 2018

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In It

Laurie is a Strive Moderator.This week, she posted:Here in this community, if we are truly &l...

Nov 26, 2018

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Episode #164: People Like Us Do Things Like This

In this latest episode, Lee Davy takes a look at Seth Godin's saying "people Like Us Do Things ...

Nov 26, 2018

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Episode #163: The Killer Statement

In today's episode, Lee Davy shares a TTAA Intensive home snippet from Adrian who says, "I need...

Nov 23, 2018

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Episode #162 A Book Review: Beyond Beliefs by Melanie Joy

  In today's episode, Lee Davy reviews the brilliant book Beyond Beliefs by Melanie Joy. &n...

Nov 12, 2018

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Episode #161: Chewing The Fat

In today's episode, Lee answers a question from Striver Erica Thornton."After 12 months of li...

Nov 09, 2018

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Life Sucks

You can inhale the perfume of a red rose, or you can burn it. Life’s what you make it. ...

Nov 07, 2018

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Irony

I recently joined Seth Godin’s Bootstrapper Workshop and had to introduce myself. I tol...

Nov 06, 2018

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Episode #160: Drugs

In today's AA Podcast episode Lee talks about alcohol's role as a drug, and how the invisible...

Nov 05, 2018

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Urine

I pissed in Jason Turner's pint, but before we get to that, a reminder of why we drink alcoho...

Nov 05, 2018

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Sunk Costs

At times during the end of my railway career, I felt like a leper. When I walked into a room,...

Nov 04, 2018

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The Network Effect

The phone system works because everyone uses it. We know when we pick up the phone, we can re...

Nov 03, 2018

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Episode #159 Alcohol Explained With William Porter

A conversation with William Porter, author of Alcohol Explained, covering William's history w...

Nov 02, 2018

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Episode #158: Alcohol Explained - A Book Review

In this episode, Lee Davy talks about a concept known as Fading Affect Bias (FAB) as describe...

Nov 01, 2018

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Episode #157 The Wall

We create a psychological wall to keep out the desire of drinking alcohol, but often this wal...

Oct 31, 2018

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Pride

 When Anna arrived at Strive, alcohol controlled her. Today, after experiencing t...

Oct 30, 2018

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Stretching

The first time I went to yoga was in LA. I didn’t realise it back then, but attending h...

Oct 29, 2018

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Episode #156: The Bad Stuff

  On Thursday 1 November, I invite you to join the TTAA Taster, a peer learning experie...

Oct 29, 2018

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Episode #155: The Value of Wine

During the TTAA October Taster, Lee Davy, fielded a question about the value of drinking wine, ...

Oct 24, 2018

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The Young

I use an egg cup.   Five droplets of zinc.   Holding my daughter’s hand, ...

Oct 22, 2018

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Episode #154: The Outlier Andrew Halmich

My name is Andrew Halmich, I am 46 and I was born and raised in Montreal, Quebec. I lost myself...

Oct 19, 2018

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Episode #153: A Book Review: The Easyway to Control Alcohol by Alle...

A book review on the life changing Easyway to Control Alcohol by Allen Carr.A new TTAA Taster b...

Oct 18, 2018

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Episode #152: The Friend

Do you have any idea how difficult it is to quit a 19-year career? I have never been as afraid ...

Oct 17, 2018

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Keep It Simple, Stupid

I'm walking down the pavement repeating my mantra. A walking meditation. I'm cold. The wind is ...

Oct 16, 2018

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Episode #150: The Stones

Lee Davy ticks another item off his bucket list with an Equinox visit to Stonehenge and shares ...

Oct 01, 2018

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Episode #151: Adrian Chiles: Drinker's Like Me - A TTAA Review

Lee Davy reviews the BBC Documentary "Drinker's Like Me."You can watch the Documentary on the B...

Sep 29, 2018

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Puke

I'm walking down the pavement repeating my mantra. A walking meditation. I'm cold. The wind is ...

Sep 24, 2018

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Episode #149: The Future You

"Positive and negative emotions cannot occupy the mind at the same time. One or the other must ...

Sep 20, 2018

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Episode #148: The Netty Pot

Korean mosquitoes dined on my legs for three-weeks while I lived under the threat of Kim droppi...

Sep 17, 2018

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Episode #147 Don’t Change The Label; Change The Culture

I've just read a report from the University of South Wales where researchers discovered, after ...

Sep 10, 2018

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Episode #146: The Social Butterfly

I'm digging through my lock up trying to find a pillow. Mercedes (I only remembered the name, b...

Sep 06, 2018

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Episode #145: The Roundabout

I am in a hotel room in Seogwipo, standing on top of a table, tackle out, staring down at the r...

Sep 05, 2018

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Episode #144: Them

Sometimes the process of becoming someone that doesn’t drink alcohol can feel like pumpin...

Aug 30, 2018

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Episode #143: Getting There

This morning, I woke at 4.45 am to climb to the peak of Seongsan Ilchulbong in Jeju, South Kore...

Aug 29, 2018

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Episode #142: Metrics

Do you count the days? Maybe, like Tony, you’ve created a percentage system? Metrics ar...

Aug 26, 2018

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Three Little Piggies

Once upon a time, there were three little pigs who each decided to build a house to protect the...

Aug 23, 2018

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Doing and Being

At Strive, we help people do the things they want to do, so they can be who they want to be.&nb...

Aug 15, 2018

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Juggling

Seth Godin has a brilliant podcast called Akimbo. Listen to it. One of his episodes is about...

Jul 29, 2018

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The Signal

In this episode, Lee Davy, shares his thoughts on the way the Russian government cont...

Jul 08, 2018

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On Being a Zealot

In this episode, Lee Davy, shares his thoughts on the benefits of talking openly, honestly...

Jul 07, 2018

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Status

We often think of status from an external perspective. How do people perceive us? The answers...

Jun 27, 2018

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Strivers

What is a Striver? I am working on the perfect set of words. Until. Then. Steve Jobs nailed...

Jun 25, 2018

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The Four-Minute Mile

On May 6, 1954, Roger Bannister became the first man to run a mile in under four minutes, clock...

Jun 20, 2018

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The Maze

At first, there was me. Angus arrived from Herefordshire. Arthur tuned in from Northern Irela...

Jun 20, 2018

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The Unlived Life

I wanted to travel the world. I wanted to own a business. I wanted to be a multi-millionaire....

Jun 20, 2018

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Identity & Essence

I got out of bed and fell asleep in the back of the car with a plastic puke bag in my back pock...

Jun 20, 2018

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And so it Begins

  I am in the library for storytime. Eight to ten adults are sitting in a circle. The lead...

Jun 14, 2018

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The Special Snowflake

I am special. People think that declaration is narcissistic. Images of me lathered up in cocon...

Jun 13, 2018

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Procrastination

  I once wrote an article called Procrastination Station. It was a long time ago when I had...

Jun 05, 2018

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Urgent or Important

  I’m a big fan of Charles Bukowski’s work. I like the way he tells it as it i...

May 31, 2018

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Busyness Versus Effectiveness

  You may come to Strive and check-in. You may return tomorrow and do it again. Hell, you m...

May 25, 2018

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Two Worlds

  It's been six months since Vanessa had a drink. She credits the Strive movement for her n...

May 23, 2018

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DOING Not Doing

  Striver Jax just made an excellent point during a homework assignment on the Truth About ...

May 22, 2018

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Shortcuts

  There are no shortcuts in this game. Resistance holds all of those hands. The Truth Ab...

May 21, 2018

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I'm Never Drinking Again

  It’s interesting. The days when I would lie in bed are over. It seems to do nothin...

May 14, 2018

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Depression

Have you ever seen a barfly, caught in a web of life's dramas? Miserable. Morose. Moody. It...

May 10, 2018

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{Insert ending here}

   Tim Martin, the chairman and founder of the UK pub-chain JD Wetherspoon, has withdr...

May 07, 2018

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The Loaf of Bread

    I just spent £3.90 on a loaf of bread. I can hear the cries of being healt...

May 04, 2018

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Amid The Mass

  You're living in Germany during Hitler's reign. Choose a role -Oscar Schindler or a perse...

May 03, 2018

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The Roles and Responsibility Statement

  Back when I worked on the railway, I had a Roles and Responsibility Statement for every p...

Apr 26, 2018

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Mr Mayonnaise

  It's 6 am. A bird serenades me. Long before alcohol addled my brain, I would have remembe...

Apr 25, 2018

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Messages

  Messages I argue with Liza a lot. I think I’m a super sleuth. When Liza communic...

Apr 24, 2018

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Mary Had a Little {xxxx}

  Mary had a little {xxx}, it's {xxxxx} was as white as {xxxx}. And {xxxxxxxx} that Mary we...

Apr 23, 2018

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The Winner

  You can spot the winner a mile away. One acts like a hunted rabbit; the other walks arou...

Apr 22, 2018

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The Best Defence

  When we eat frogs legs, we don't consider that once they were dangling very close to a ti...

Apr 21, 2018

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Your Truth

   I walked out of the bar and into the slaughterhouse in 2009. I saw friends and fami...

Apr 20, 2018

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Of Life and Literature

  In 1969, the author and poet, Charles Bukowski, wrote a letter to Gerard Dombrowski after...

Apr 18, 2018

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Shame on You

  Here's an email I got this morning. If you truly cared about people who drink too much a...

Apr 18, 2018

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Shame

Mar 26, 2018

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Showing Up

   Woody Allen once said that 80% of success is simply ‘showing up.’ What...

Mar 21, 2018

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Are You One of Us?

We check-in daily. We share our feelings. We are vulnerable. We drop tears of laughter and joy ...

Mar 12, 2018

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Feeling Incapable?

Mar 09, 2018

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The Robot

    I bought my daughter a robot. "It's the future," I told her as I gripped the lit...

Mar 08, 2018

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Perfectly Fucked Up

Mar 07, 2018

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Snow

  As I walk down the street, listening to the sound of dumb TV shows booming out of opened ...

Mar 06, 2018

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Utterly Hopeless

Mar 06, 2018

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Raw

  Her little face. Terror. I have a wet plate in my hands. Something is wrong. I hear the...

Mar 05, 2018

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Chess

  In chess, if you think one move at a time it doesn't matter how sharp you think you are, ...

Mar 05, 2018

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Pull Your Finger Out

  You have the eyes of the poor. You are a victim of circumstance. You look at the rich a...

Mar 04, 2018

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The Course

    Two types of people take training courses. There are those who cherish their acq...

Mar 03, 2018

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In a Hole

  It was one of the most deceitful and yet needed messages. I was sitting upright in bed o...

Mar 02, 2018

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An Ode to Town

  How I yearn for silence.   We used to find it around town at 2 am in the morning...

Feb 19, 2018

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Happy As Larry

A man plays piano in the library a few feet away. You can't hear a sound. He has his headphones...

Feb 16, 2018

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Broken

£15 for a pile of washing.   Not bad.   As the young laundrette lady takes ...

Feb 15, 2018

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The Silence When The Gunfire Ends

    The Punisher, Frank Castle, is in a room with other war veterans sharing his thou...

Jan 27, 2018

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Occam’s Razor

  Ethanol is a potent poison that kills 3.3 million people a year and is the causal facto...

Jan 26, 2018

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Smarter Cells

Bruce Lipton, the author of Biology of Belief, writes extensively about his admiration for the ...

Jan 25, 2018

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Ten

Another year has gone, like the wolf who tried to break into the last house of the little piggies...

Jan 25, 2018

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Caught in Addiction

Tommy Rosen said, “To be caught in addiction of any kind is one of the loneliest experien...

Jan 24, 2018

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The Divining Rod

The ancient Aboriginals used a divining rod to find water. They walked along with a stick in hand...

Jan 15, 2018

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White Space (Part 3)

Phil Galfond is one of the best poker players in the world earning millions of dollars using a ga...

Jan 13, 2018

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Warts And All  

  If you could be anyone who would you be? Write a list of potentials. Good. Screw it up...

Jan 12, 2018

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A Cell’s Life

  Who are we? There are many ways of approaching this question, and today, we'll take the ...

Jan 11, 2018

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White Space (Part 2)

It's not about doing what we want to do. That's not right. We could moonwalk like Michael Jacks...

Jan 10, 2018

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Mercantilism

Mercantilism - the theory that assumes making as many things as possible, within a country's bo...

Jan 09, 2018

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Moderation

  There is an old lady with a bad memory and another who just can't be arsed talking to you...

Jan 07, 2018

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Do It

Where I walk, the sprinklers kick in, and the faux raindrops hit the ground like thunder. The w...

Jan 06, 2018

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Shut Up And Drink Your Gin

My mate had one line in the school production of Oliver Twist. As one of Fagin's sausage eatin...

Dec 27, 2017

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Mellow Yellow

Stop doing what you're doing.If you're standing knee deep in a freezing pond trying to catch pn...

Dec 22, 2017

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Sobriety #1

So how are you doing this thing you're doing? Are you sat on a stool milking the cow, or are y...

Dec 22, 2017

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5 Days Till Xmas

I want you to do something a little different this Christmas. Instead of spending your hard ear...

Dec 22, 2017

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Another 11 Reasons I Do What I Do

11. What’s your minimal viable product? My minimal viable product was an eight-week course...

Dec 19, 2017

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10 Reasons I Do What I Do

I love Bernadette Jiwa. Bernadette is a marketing and branding genius. I thought it would be ins...

Dec 18, 2017

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Time

On my best hangover days, I would sleep through the entire next day. I couldn't open my eyes for ...

Dec 14, 2017

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Be Like Messi

Lionel Messi has scored 362 goals in 396 appearances for Barcelona, 61 goals in 123 appearances...

Dec 13, 2017

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Putting Out Fires

When I arrived at the campsite, the owner greeted us, barefoot, with mud squelched between dirt...

Dec 12, 2017

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Bob

I need a new name for Bob the Homeless Guy. I see him every day, sitting in the same chair, wear...

Dec 11, 2017

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Fucking Things Up

I’m teaching my daughter Zia to count. She is up to six. We use fingers. It’s al...

Dec 10, 2017

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David Bowie is Dead

David Bowie is Dead! I'm watching the football, drinking my cup of tea. An older man, who was re...

Dec 09, 2017

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Sandcastles

  Do you remember when we were kids at the beach, and how we would carve out a pathway in...

Dec 08, 2017

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Awareness v Interest

When I'm in LA, I like to visit Michael Beckwith's Agape Spiritual Church in Culver City. Duri...

Dec 07, 2017

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The Butt

As I walk down Foothills, on my way to a desk where I can ply my trade, I keep seeing the photo...

Dec 06, 2017

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Twinkle

At night, I read nursery rhymes to my 13-month-old daughter, Zia. There is a double-page where...

Dec 05, 2017

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Party Pooper

Another gem from the mind of Strive member, Lee Monks. The next time your significant other ca...

Dec 04, 2017

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The Wooly Woofter

When I was young, you were cool or not. Life was like a video game. You started from the place of...

Dec 03, 2017

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Frogger

He never leapt from one side of the river to the other, did he? Our little green friend had to c...

Dec 02, 2017

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The Cause

“Have you ever wanted something so badly that it possessed your body and your soul, through...

Dec 01, 2017

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Tolerate

Occasionally, someone will ask my permission before ordering an alcoholic drink. My response is i...

Nov 30, 2017

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Popular v Difficult

  We love making popular decisions. The pat on the back, the wink-wink-nudge-nudge, the fe...

Nov 29, 2017

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Fish Out of Water

Viewing the world through the lens of alcoholism, you believe that drinking alcohol is normal, ...

Nov 28, 2017

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Alcohol is the New 'Lost'

The 100 mph entrepreneur, Gary Vaynerchuk, used to tell people to ‘Stop watching fucking ...

Nov 27, 2017

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The Hofmeister Can

When I was 18, I moved home for the first time. I rented a bedroom in a three-bedroom house owned...

Nov 26, 2017

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Think Differently

Dai and his heavy handlebar moustache sits me down and tells me the perceived value I find in smo...

Nov 25, 2017

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Results

Someone told me that our results indicate the level of our commitment. Are you getting the resul...

Nov 24, 2017

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Naked

“The trap had a ghastly perfection. If someone told you you’d go to hell if you tho...

Nov 23, 2017

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Promises

Zia wakes me up, picking at my sleeping mask, breathing the sweet-scent of ‘Appa' into my n...

Nov 22, 2017

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Exploration

Grab a cup of tea, Kombucha, or glass of Vimto - whatever floats your boat - and reflect on your ...

Nov 21, 2017

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The Examined Life

When I was knocking back a bottle of wine a night, I knew every World Cup winner since 1930, the ...

Nov 20, 2017

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Lens

"It is simply not possible to have a secure, connected relationship if we don't truly understand ...

Nov 17, 2017

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Forgetting

I worked in the rail industry for 19-years. Within a few months of retiring, the calls began with...

Nov 17, 2017

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The Canoe

Relationships are like a canoe.  So tell me, who has the sore arms? If one of you dropped ...

Nov 16, 2017

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The Decision

It’s never been easier to quit alcohol. Hello Sunday Morning, Soberistas, Hip Sobriety, SM...

Nov 10, 2017

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The Asch Paradigm

  In the 1950s, a social psychologist named, Solomon Asch, carried out a series of experime...

Nov 09, 2017

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Philosophy

“On a micro level once you no longer drink after abusing alcohol philosophy is inevitable&h...

Nov 08, 2017

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‘Content’ or ‘Process’ - Part 1

  I'm in the garage, recording training videos, listening to Blaggers ITA singing Oxygen. A...

Nov 07, 2017

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Fuck You Death!

*At Strive we share; that's how we grow. Here is a check-in from Lee Monks.  One of my best...

Nov 07, 2017

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The Lizard

I see the same lizard in the same spot during my morning walk. To me, he looks so cute; catching...

Oct 29, 2017

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What Do You Do?

“It was for this reason that I wanted to look at writers who drank, though God knows there&...

Oct 28, 2017

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War

Melanie Joy pushed me towards this quote in her brilliant book Beyond Beliefs. “Once you h...

Oct 27, 2017

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The Sardines

Karl Ove Knausgaard on his father from Struggles Book 1: “All he wants of me is that I do ...

Oct 26, 2017

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The Dead

2.5 million people a year die from alcohol-related illnesses. Where are they? Why can't we see ...

Oct 25, 2017

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The Leaf Blower

I'm peeling a carrot when the dogs start going crazy at the back door. I look outside, and the ga...

Oct 24, 2017

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IT

There is a scene in the 2017 version of Stephen King's IT where Bill is about to go into the hous...

Oct 20, 2017

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Differences

  We are programmed to believe that differences are the death knell for a relationship.&nbs...

Oct 19, 2017

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Alcohol Fucks You Up!

Alcohol is an intoxicant and a central nervous depressant. It prevents neurotransmitters in the b...

Oct 13, 2017

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Leaks

If you want to be a top poker player, spend a significant portion of your time reviewing your gam...

Oct 11, 2017

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The White Space (Part 1)

The mistake people make when trying to quit alcohol is to focus on the alcohol. What follows is a...

Oct 06, 2017

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F.E.A.R

    Ian Brown sang, “For Every Man A Religion.” Drinking is our religion...

Oct 05, 2017

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Being Wrong

I'm typing on a Mac. I used to use Microsoft. I said I would never use a Mac, and then over time,...

Oct 04, 2017

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Learning

We turn on Facebook and Denise is drinking out of a coconut on a beach. We take a peek at Instag...

Oct 03, 2017

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A Movement

Three elements define a movement: 1. A story. Who are we? What future are we trying to build?2. ...

Oct 02, 2017

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Mind Wandering

I read a philosophy paper suggesting two-thirds of our life is a state of unconscious thought. "...

Oct 01, 2017

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Unlikely

Driving a car is difficult. Doing a crow yoga pose is difficult. Playing the guitar is difficult....

Sep 30, 2017

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Red & Green Sauce

I'm in this Mexican joint. A picture of a giant cock hangs on the wall. I'm watching College Foot...

Sep 29, 2017

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The Contrarian View

We quit drinking. Our partner doesn’t. Our parents don’t. Our siblings keep on suppin...

Sep 28, 2017

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Don’t Tell The Boss

Hiding such an important and vulnerable human experience such as addiction is kryptonite&nbs...

Sep 27, 2017

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Burdensome Bollocks

How wonderful do you feel after you’ve helped someone? So why feel like a burden when you ...

Sep 26, 2017

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Emperors, Clothes and Booze

Do you remember the old Hans Christian Andersen tale about the Emperor’s New Clothes? A co...

Sep 25, 2017

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Lululemon Heads

On the spot, name five companies that stand for something greater than profit.1. Patagonia2. Wh...

Sep 24, 2017

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Education

As soon as education gets difficult (and useful education always gets difficult) it’s socia...

Sep 23, 2017

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Six Pack

I'm in America. My boy is in the UK. So when he posts on Instagram, I get excited. It's my window...

Sep 22, 2017

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Do You Remember The First Time?

The first time I watched Pulp live, they supported Blur in a gig at Mile End Stadium. It pissed d...

Sep 21, 2017

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Stealth Drinking

Stealth Drinking is a tool some use when they want to quit alcohol but don’t want to draw a...

Sep 20, 2017

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Picking Up Where Allen Carr Left Off

Allen Carr has been the most influential presence in my life. I read Easyway to Quit Smoking Perm...

Sep 19, 2017

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Misdirection

  “Whereas in 2010 obesity and related illnesses killed about 3 million people, terro...

Sep 15, 2017

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Reducetarian

I've learned a new word. "Reducetarian." The name is synonymous with the vegan movement. It des...

Sep 14, 2017

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Lager Dash

  My mate always orders lager with a dash of lemonade. It isn't an unusual request, most o...

Sep 12, 2017

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Support

You are seven days sober, you go out with your friends on a Saturday night, and Pete asks you ten...

Sep 09, 2017

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AI

In 2013, this pair of smarty pants: Carl Benedikt Frey and Michael A. Osbourne, wrote a paper cal...

Sep 09, 2017

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Take Your Time

Dave Gahan used to tell people to enjoy the silence, and it stuck. We don’t want to tell...

Sep 09, 2017

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Be Happy

I'm in America, existing in a perpetual sense of judgment. One area I notice excels in the US, c...

Sep 07, 2017

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32-Seconds

Cross the road between Starbucks and Trader Joe's in my part of town, and you get 32-seconds. I'...

Sep 02, 2017

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The Pigs

A group of UK firemen saved the lives of 18 piglets and two sows from being burned alive after 60...

Sep 01, 2017

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Three

Kevin Kelly wrote a famous blog post called 1,000 True Fans urging creatives to stop trying to ch...

Aug 31, 2017

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The Bouncer

People call you an idiot, weird, or boring for not drinking. “It’s so much fun,&rdqu...

Aug 30, 2017

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The CAFO

The other day I was a pig. Virtual reality (VR) allowed me to spend five minutes in a drift wait...

Aug 29, 2017

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Floats

I let the dogs out for a poo, and see the floats in the photo in a perpetual state of inertia. Th...

Aug 26, 2017

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Cultivation Theory

I lived on a council estate in Reddish, Stockport, a colder and rainier version of the favelas of...

Aug 25, 2017

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Fake

Don’t believe the apocryphal story you tell yourself about the number of social media follo...

Aug 25, 2017

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Perennial

Don’t look at alcohol as a problem that needs a quick fix. When we think like this, we do ...

Aug 24, 2017

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Killjoy

The party rages hard downstairs. I lie on my bed, bouncing, laptop rays shooting into my balls, ...

Aug 23, 2017

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Climbing

  Climbing is a puzzle, it's not about brute strength. You need a plan; think several moves...

Aug 22, 2017

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Great Expectations

The glass ceiling of happiness is held in place by two stout pillars, one psychological, the othe...

Aug 21, 2017

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The Two Faces of Terrorism

The Institute for Economics and Peace, reported in 2015, that 32,658 people lost their lives duri...

Aug 20, 2017

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Those Creaking Bones

If you are over forty, close your eyes for a minute and try to remember the body you had at twent...

Aug 19, 2017

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The Miracle of the Mundane

James strips down his bike, squeezes some oil here and there, and then puts it back again. Nicky...

Aug 18, 2017

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Risk

Think back to the times you took a risk. How did it turn out? All of my so-called risks turned ...

Aug 17, 2017

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Thoughts & Beliefs

It’s ok to think you’re a stupid motherfucker because you had a bottle of wine last n...

Aug 16, 2017

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The Pub

Spend any significant time in a coffee shop, and you'll see people divulging in practices that im...

Aug 15, 2017

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Copycats

My ten-month-old daughter has begun her foray into the English language. When I say cow, she moo...

Aug 14, 2017

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The Con

I’m in the bar with my good friend Paul. We are talking about my drugging days. After ano...

Aug 07, 2017

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The Alcohol Spectrum

We all exist on the Alcohol Spectrum. At one end sits Mabel, who has a snifter of cherry brandy ...

Aug 07, 2017

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Change and Creativity

You are not just quitting alcohol. You are changing the world. A pattern has emerged in the peo...

Aug 07, 2017

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The Stress Hormone

You drink alcohol because it provides you with perceived value. This perception creates desire. ...

Aug 06, 2017

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The Wheel

I used to play poker with this lovely guy. At dinner, he would go into his local bookmakers and ...

Aug 06, 2017

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Committed

“Do not commit yourself to anybody or anything, for that is to be a slave, a slave to every...

Aug 05, 2017

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Mood

Denise has quit alcohol. She is expecting raindrops to turn into her favourite smoothie. The swi...

Aug 04, 2017

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Work

A week earlier, I made a note on my bucket list to be a public speaker. Now, here I was, walking ...

Aug 03, 2017

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Curiosity

There was the pub. There was work. There was the couch. There was the TV. There was the bed. ...

Aug 02, 2017

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Placebo

The women behind me in the cafe are talking about wine. “I love a good red.” "I lov...

Aug 01, 2017

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Mocktails

I took my boy to a swanky restaurant. You should have seen him, like a peacock, strutting his st...

Jul 30, 2017

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Apes Together Strong

I've been saying, "Apes Together, Strong" ever since watching the latest Planet of the Apes movie...

Jul 29, 2017

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Fuck The Strive Forum

Sometimes, logging on to the Strive Forum can feel like walking through the havoc of Chinatown, b...

Jul 29, 2017

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Waking Up

At the Strive Community Forum we check-in, daily. Why? To empty our heads. To learn to be vuln...

Jul 28, 2017

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Stabbed

I was 18 when I went on holiday with my mate and his girlfriend. I knew I was a spare prick, but ...

Jul 22, 2017

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The Worst Dad in the World

I gave my son away and didn't give a fat fuck because I thought I could have him back whenever ...

Jul 21, 2017

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Are You on The Right Bus?

 I was on the bus when I saw a man standing by the side of the road holding a piece of cardb...

Jul 20, 2017

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Secrets

He told his friend he was gay. He hadn't told his parents or siblings. Imagine, how it fee...

Jul 18, 2017

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The Pitcher Plant

If you quit heroin, would you spend an afternoon hanging out with your former heroin buddies wa...

Jul 17, 2017

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Dr Jekyll & Mr Hyde  

In the novel Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde, the transformation between mild mannered Jekyll, and the mons...

Jul 17, 2017

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The One Thought

  There is an excellent book by Gary W. Keller, and Jay Papasan called The One Thing. &nbs...

Jul 14, 2017

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The First Rule of The Truth About Alcohol

 Have you ever watched Fight Club?  Watch it.  Then watch it again.  The...

Jul 13, 2017

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Rinse - Repeat

 Nobody understands you; we get that.  You feel like a stray mutt, hypnotised by every...

Jul 12, 2017

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Ducklings and Drunks  

He is lying on the bench, t-shirt pulled up, showing a flabby belly, comatose. Sitting on the flo...

Jul 10, 2017

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The Train

As I got off the train and proceeded to walk down the aisle with my rucksack already weighing m...

Jul 10, 2017

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We Are Not Alcoholics

Most dictionary definitions describe an alcoholic thus:  A person suffering from Alcoholi...

Jul 10, 2017

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2Q17

“On separating from the religion, they had set foot in the real world. As far as Tengo co...

Jul 05, 2017

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A Trip Into Town

Foreward: At the Strive Community Forum we are encouraged to check-in daily; share our emotiona...

Jul 05, 2017

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Change Cuts Both Ways

Change cuts both ways. Take the recent decision to rebrand from The Needy Helper to The Truth ...

Jul 03, 2017

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The Four Needles

I was in Sing & Sign class with Liza and Zia this morning. Liza went to the toilet leaving m...

Jul 03, 2017

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The Cheesecake

  I don’t eat sugar, so cheesecake is not in my periphery under normal circumstances....

Jun 29, 2017

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The Coffee Shop

  The baby stares; a rusk stuck to his mouth with the congeal-like dribble. His mother laug...

Jun 27, 2017

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More of us Should Start Wearing Skirts

The UK heatwave prompted the boys at the ISCA Academy in Exeter to ask their teachers if they c...

Jun 27, 2017

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Finding The Delight in Difference

It looked as inconspicuous as a cockroach floating on its back in a bowl of yoghurt. It was bran...

Jun 24, 2017

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